Over the course of the past eighteen years we have experienced some pretty hilarious happenings in our public services here at Harvest! Below I’ve listed four episodes. Three of them actually happened. Your job is to guess which one is a complete fabrication. After carefully reading each of them, write your guess in the comment section. I won’t post the comments until after I reveal the impostor episode. You folks from Harvest have a decided advantage if you’ve been around for awhile.
After only three weeks in our new building (actually the building was a 100 years old, but new to us), we were just beginning to feel at home. Decorations were in place, and the auditorium was already full; in fact, perhaps a little bit too full. Did I mention that the building was 100 years old? Well, so were the pews. And evidently they were not accustomed to holding a full load, because somewhere between point 2 and point 3 of my morning message, the entire third row on the left side collapsed, along with a few egos! Although it wasn’t funny then, the memory of nine adults—dressed in their Sunday best—sprawled out on the floor is a keeper. Where was instagram when I needed it?
A guest preacher was beginning the first few sentences of his message when a mouse scurried across the front of the auditorium and then underneath the first few pews. People began to squeal—women and men. Western Pennsylvanian men can shoot a large buck with a bow and arrow, but get them out of the relative safety of their deer stand and take away their weapon… now, that’s a different story. Anyway, in a flash, a younger man swooped down upon the invading monster, scooped him up in his hands (disregarding any of a number of infectious diseases), and cast him out the back door of the church, all to the now erupting applause of a thankful (and now safe from the ravaging rodent) audience.
The choir had already begun to sing its opener. The people settled in for an exciting Sunday morning service. An air of expectancy filled the room as the members of the congregation contemplated the words and enjoyed the catchy melody of the choir’s special opening song. That is, until the one tardy choir member decided to join the group halfway through the song. Yup. And to make matters more complicated, he walked right up to the stage, only to realize that the stairs were on the other side. No worries. Employing the “tuck and roll” technique, he simply side-somersaulted onto the platform, assumed his place in front of the front row, and stood still just in time to sing the last note! And who said the opening chorus is just a mundane way to get people settled into the service?
I was in the middle of my message, preaching away to the occasional “amen” (or groan, for that matter). Anyway, in through the back door of the auditorium enters a man in an advanced stage of inebriation (that means “stone drunk” for my Starbucks drinking friends). Did anyone try to stop him? Of course not. He staggered right down the aisle toward me yelling for someone to “get the car out of his parking spot” or he would [words not suitable for Christian blog use]! Thankfully two of our more alert men, or maybe I should say, our only two alert men jumped up at the last minute and escorted him out, but not before he had “preached” for about 30 seconds. Now if we could only get the preacher to state his message that quickly…
Source: Consider This